Beautiful Beginnings Blog

    peaceIn today’s uncertain times, sometimes events are not always as we would dream or plan. Occasionally, circumstances beyond anyone’s control happen, and although the birth still happens, it turns out to be much more different than the birth you imagined or sought after.

    I think that in these last few months we have all come to the realization that we don’t always get to “do life” the way we want. Though perhaps true, we find that we must, in those moments, find the peace to overcome, adapt, accept and move forward smartly with renewed purpose and joy. 

    Surrender! Not to the inevitable, but to the peace and love of accomplishing life’s greatest event! Don’t become so overwhelmed or despondent that you miss the joy of the moment. Your baby needs your strong mind, body and soul. Surrender doesn’t mean you failed! It means that you have found a way! You have succeeded despite setbacks and unforeseen circumstances! 

    Yet the process of surrender can itself be hard. It’s hard to give up control of your body, thoughts, dreams, etc. Surrendering your mind and your body can be one of the most difficult things you do in life. You want to feel in control. However, for birth ironically, the less in control you actually are, the easier the process will be.  Letting go of expectations, letting go of the perceived discomfort between contractions, and letting go of control is a good place to begin when falling into the surrender of birth. Relaxation is key to birth and it cannot begin to take place unless you surrender to The Process. Fighting is the opposite of relaxing, and that will hamper birth. 

    Shifting the language of birth is another way to mentally prepare for what was happening within you. The one word you will hear and think the most during birth is contraction.  You can replace this word with _____ (choose the word) “expansions” “surge” “wave;” whatever you desire. Why would you tell your body every 2-5 minutes to contract and close when you could be telling it to expand and open to help that baby out? Creating mantras for your birth space will focus your mind and body from the correct perspective... surrendering. These thoughts, ideas (mantras) are things you can read and recite for your entire labor and the days preceding it: 

    - Every expansion brings me closer to meeting my baby.
    - I am stewarding a soul into this world.
    - I relax and remain calm during labor.
    - I am at peace and covered in grace.
    - I am loved. I am strong.
    - I am calm, relaxed, and in control of myself.
    - I was created to do this.

    The list could go on and on as there are so many. So find the ones that speak to you and that bring you peace. 

    If you know me I have probably told you that birth is unpredictable. “We plan-God laughs!” (Old Yiddish Proverb). Your baby will arrive when he or she is meant arrive and how they are meant to be born. And you know what? There’s not a heck of a lot that we can do about it! What we can do is relax, surrender, and Semper Paratus! (Always Be Ready!)

    Love and prayers dear women of strength